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Wednesday | October 20, 2010

Barack Does Bridge City

Barack Does Bridge City
As the President rolls through Portland today, the question on the tip of each wagging Portlandian tongue is: "Does Obama support Predator Drone Bombing (PDB) in his 'Heart of Hearts' (HoH)? Or is National Security Policy (NSP) imposed by Sinister Deep State Forces (SDSF) that possess the wretched bowels of the National Security State (NSS)?" Enquiring minds want to know!
Go to story: Pakistan, Afghanistan on Obama's agenda

Tuesday | October 19, 2010

When the Timbers were away, the Beavers could play.

Timbers Ready To Chop Down Some Trees!
But wait! Wasn't that the Beavers' job!?!
Go to story: Major League Soccer Expansion: Portland Timbers Sign Four Players

Monday | October 18, 2010

Shoes with a "smaller footprint."

Are You Stumbling Over Your Own Clown-Sized Feet?
Take heart! Chinese footware giant Li-Ning has established a "foothold" in Portland. Centuries of tradition practically guarantees wearers a "smaller footprint."
Go to story: Move over Carbon Footprint. The Chinese have landed in Portland to introduce a smaller footprint for runners.

Sunday | October 17, 2010

Beavers to migrate out of Beaver State.

Portland Beavers Will Migrate To More "Southerly Regions"
A Portland institution since 1903, the triple-A team is pawned off to a San Diego-based baseball executive.
Go to story: Portland Beavers Sold To San Diego Padres' Owner

Saturday | October 16, 2010

Christians and the beast.

North Portland's Roughriders Persecute Christian Royalty
"It didn't take long for the bigger and stronger Roosevelt Roughriders to jump in front of the Portland Christian Royals in a non league football game Friday night..."
Go to story: Roosevelt Roughriders run over Portland Christian in Oregon football

Friday | October 15, 2010

Bungling Burgling Shrub

Setback For Green Economy: Shrub Man Gets Clipped
Maybe he should've disguised himself as a museum piece to pull off a heist at the yard & garden center.
Go to story: Man dressed as underbrush tries to rob museum

Thursday | October 14, 2010

Have you hosed your Standpipe today?

The Glen Jackson Bridge's Standpipe System Serves An Honorable & Noble Purpose
Did you know that standpipes "basically serve the same purpose as fire hydrants and are used by fire personnel to supply water to remote locations." Neither did PortlandWiki's NewsEditorBOT (NEbot) until it stumbled upon the Fire Blog.
Go to story: Station 12 Tests Glen Jackson Bridge's Standpipe System

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