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This page is where stuff on the [[PortlandWiki|main page]]'s [[PortlandWiki#News|news section]] goes when it changes from ''news'' to ''olds''. Observe forgotten current events, humorous behavior and other hijinks of primitive human societies from the dawn of time!
This page is where stuff on the [[PortlandWiki|main page]]'s [[PortlandWiki#News|news section]] goes when it changes from ''news'' to ''olds''. Observe forgotten current events and primitive human societies from the dawn of time!


=== Monday | September 13, 2010 ===
==Earlier Months==
'''Help Wanted: Professional [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malingering Malingerer]'''<br />
From Craig's List Help Wanted Ad: "Part-time temporary positions available for healthy women between 45-55 years of age who are needed to portray 'fake' patients of Hispanic descent as part of a study assessing healthcare delivery in rural Oregon."<br />
Go to story: [http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/hea/1942908413.html Simulated Patient Position available (Portland, OR )]


=== Sunday | September 12, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/April 2011|April 2011]]
[[File:Zombies NightoftheLivingDead.jpg|thumb|Eating Out: A community of like-minded eaters, coming together.]]
'''Enjoy Life--Eat Out More Often [http://www.restaurant.org/aboutus/history/ *]'''<br />
[http://portlandeatsout.com/ Portland Eats Out] is "a community of like-minded eaters, coming together." "Staff Eaters" hit the streets to build "a tribe of restaurants, cafes, coffee shops, bars and food carts to participate in the program." "Members" are encouraged "to '[[Portland Eats Out|Eat Out]]' frequently on slower nights."<br />
Go to story: [http://www.pdxfoodpress.com/2010/09/12/introducing-portland-eats-out-a-community-focused-dining-program-supporting-local-restaurants-and-the-oregon-food-bank/ Introducing Portland Eats Out, a community-focused dining program supporting local restaurants and the Oregon Food Bank]


=== Saturday | September 11, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/March 2011|March 2011]]
[[File:Blackbloc-flag.jpg|thumb|Member of Portland's Black Bloc (a loose coalition of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_bloc#Police_infiltration infiltrators], snitches, ''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agent_provocateur agents provocateurs]'' and homeless [http://gothdating.org/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/goth-girls.jpg goth-vegan runaways]) carries the flag in honor of National Fly The Flag Day.]]
'''Today is "national fly the flag" or "burn someone's holy book" day!'''<br />
Tea Party militia groups urge Americans to "[http://www.resistnet.com/group/newjerseypatriots/forum/topics/get-your-flag-ready-180 fly the flag]," while dominionist [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dove_World_Outreach_Center religious cults] threaten to burn some other religion's holy book. In Portland, independent journalists and talk show hosts will burn copies of the ''9/11 Commission Report''.<br />
Go to story: [http://mediamonarchy.blogspot.com/2010/09/group-to-burn-911-commission-report-at.html GROUP TO BURN 9/11 COMMISSION REPORT AT ANNIVERSARY GATHERING]


=== Friday | September 10, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/February 2011|February 2011]]
[[File:Snow bud green thing.jpg|thumb|Bonghits in [[Bridgetown]]: Will Portland's [[Snow Bud|Snow Bud and the Flower People]] make a surprise appearance!?!]]
'''Bonghits With Blumenauer In Bridgetown'''<br />
National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML) rolls into Portland for 39th annual convention.<br />
Go to story: [http://the420times.com/2010/09/norml-national-conference-in-portland-or/ NORML National Conference In Portland, OR]


=== Thursday | September 9, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/January 2011|January 2011]]
'''Texas Hold 'Em Fever Overwhelms House Of Pain'''<br />
Uncontrollable "rowdy, lawless" behavior at illegal NE Portland gambling den leaves city toothless.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=128398076102012500 Poker gamble fails to pay off]


=== Wednesday | September 8, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/December 2010|December 2010]]
[[File:BikeFree-Buttercup.jpg‎|thumb|Bike thieves "liberate" [http://www.bikefree.org/?p=1805 Bike Free's] "Buttercup."]]
'''Charity Begins At Home; Ends In Portland'''<br />
After a 3500 mile ride from Maryland to Oregon, [http://www.bikefree.org/?p=1805 Bike Free's] "Buttercup" gets ripped off in Portland. How will Paul and Adam complete their journey and carry out the Bike Free mission? Fear not! "With God’s help," they’ll "overcome this selfish deed, get bikes to the kids, and continue spreading the word about the goodness of bikes."<br />
Go to story: [http://bikeportland.org/2010/09/07/bike-stolen-in-portland-after-3000-mile-charity-ride-39089 Bike stolen in Portland after 3,000 mile charity ride]


=== Tuesday | September 7, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/November 2010|November 2010]]
'''Big Timbers Run Little Beavers Outta P-Town'''<br />
[[Portland Beavers]], the Rose City's minor league baseball team and Portland institution since 1903, is pushed out of [[PGE Park]] (formerly [[Multnomah Stadium]]) by Portland's new major league soccer team, [[Portland Timbers]].<br />
Go to story: [http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2010/baseball/mlb/wires/09/06/2010.ap.bbm.goodbye.beavers.1st.ld.writethru.0872/ Triple-A Beavers say goodbye to Portland]


=== Monday | September 6, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/October 2010|October 2010]]
[[File:Oxbow Park1.JPG|thumb|Oxbow Regional Park: A wonderful place to raise your homeless family.]]
'''Oxbow Regional Park: A Wonderful Place To Raise Your Homeless Family'''<br />
Did you lose your job quite a while back? Your unemployment insurance finally sputtered out? A bailed-out bank foreclosed your family out of your home, and you're sick of squabbling with other homeless folks on Portland's mean streets? Take heart! Oxbow Regional Park's campground is open year 'round, it's not far from Portland, and [http://stagbeetlepower.blogspot.com/2010/09/oxbow-regional-park.html Stag Beetle Power!] says it's a wonderful place to bring the kids!<br />
Go to story: [http://stagbeetlepower.blogspot.com/2010/09/oxbow-regional-park.html Oxbow Regional Park]


=== Sunday | September 5, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/September 2010|September 2010]]
'''Sun Devils Scuttle Portland's Vikings'''<br />
If you can't stand the heat, get out of the Devils' kitchen.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.goviks.com/news/2010/9/5/FB_0905102736.aspx Arizona State Handles Vikings, 54-9]


=== Saturday | September 4, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/August 2010|August 2010]]
[[File:Asphalt-to-gardens.jpg|thumb|From depraved to [http://culturechange.org/issue10/rregister.html depaved]: volunteers remove asphalt from church parking lot to create community garden.]]
'''Tearin' Up The Parking Lot'''<br />
City Commissioner Nick Fish helps "[http://depave.org/work/vermont-hills-community-garden/ Depave]" a SW Portland church's parking lot, transforming it from asphalt-covered dead zone to community garden.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.portlandonline.com/fish/index.cfm?a=315916 Depave photos]


=== Friday | September 3, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/Early 2010|Early 2010]]
[[File:Locker-room-eviction.jpg|thumb|Locker Room Eviction]]
'''Locker Room Pragmatism'''<br />
City assures public it's providing Portland's homeless folks with access to storage lockers for "practical--not just humanitarian--reasons." Will "creeping compassionism" ultimately undermine self-righteous ruthlessness and free-market fanaticism? Experts fret over the "inevitable unwinding" of multiple decades of carefully contrived pro-corporate cultural conditioning.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.today.msnbc.msn.com/id/38993089/ns/local_news-portland_or/ Homeless get storage lockers in Portland]


=== Thursday | September 2, 2010 ===
* [[Old news/Late 2009|Late 2009]]
'''Multnomah County [http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tapped%20out "Taps Out"] Disposable Plastic Water Bottles'''<br />
Commissioner asks employees to "[http://www.surveygizmo.com/s3/328800/Bottled-Water pledge]" oaths of loyalty.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.portlandonline.com/water/index.cfm?c=39678&a=315454 Multnomah County "Takes Back the Tap!"]


=== Wednesday | September 1, 2010 ===
== References ==
[[File:Portland_Beavers.jpg‎|thumb|Portland Beavers! (''From the sketchpad of [http://www.subwayfox.net/?q=node/478 SubwayFox.net].'')]]
<References />
'''Portland Dealt A Bad Hand'''<br />
Aces come down hard on the Beavers.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.rgj.com/article/20100831/SPORTS03/100831075/1321/news Reno Aces defeat Portland Beavers]


=== Tuesday | August 31, 2010 ===
[[Category:Old news]]
'''Food Cart Fight'''<br />
Will Bing's Food Cart Finder best Google Maps' Food Carts Portland!?! The battle rages as iPhone and Android apps skulk nearby.<br />
Go to story: [http://portland.daveknows.org/2010/08/31/battle-of-the-portland-food-cart-apps/ Battle of the Portland Food Cart Apps]
 
=== Monday | August 30, 2010 ===
'''Former Transportation Office Spokeswoman Awarded DUII'''<br />
Mary Volm falls off motor scooter while allegedly intoxicated. Mid-life transportation crisis for would-be Portland City Councilperson?<br />
Go to story: [http://www.mycentraloregon.com/news/state/ap/191115/Former-Portland-candidate-faces-Ore-DUII-charge.html Former Portland candidate faces Ore. DUII charge]
 
=== Sunday | August 29, 2010 ===
[[File:Go-By-Streetcar-Sign.JPG|thumb|The "go by streetcar" sign at NW Lovejoy and 10th in Portland.]]
'''A Streetcar Fuels Desire'''<br />
Other towns covet Portland's street car success.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2010-08-30-streetcars30_ST_N.htm http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2010-08-30-streetcars30_ST_N.htm]
 
=== Saturday | August 28, 2010 ===
[[File:Electric-car-juice-pump.jpg|thumb|Electric car cattle prod.]]
'''Electric Car Cattle Prod'''<br />
Oregon's governor pushes an electric car "future" while [[TriMet]] [http://blogs.wweek.com/news/2010/02/10/trimet-cuts-the-grim-details/ eviscerates public transit]. Will [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mountaintop_removal_mining strip mined coal] compete with [http://www.huffingtonpost.com/david-helvarg/gulf-oil-disaster-not-war_b_625938.html oil wars] as the [http://www.nader.org/index.php?/archives/1425-The-Progressive-Magazine-The-Profit-in-Highway-Slaughter.html roadway slaughter] continues?<br />
Go to story: [http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=128277194891981800 Road to electric cars not so easy]
 
=== Friday | August 27, 2010 ===
[[File:N-Jonesmore-Street-1913 Courtesy Dan-Davis VintagePortland.jpg|thumb|Horse teams and hand tools--that's how streets were built a hundred years ago.]]
'''Ninety-Seven Year-Old "Green Jobs" Initiative'''<br />
These employed folks (and their horses too!) from nearly a century ago already had "green jobs." Then cars came along and ruined everything.<br />
Go to story: [http://vintageportland.wordpress.com/2010/08/27/n-jonesmore-street-1913/ N Jonesmore Street, 1913]
 
=== Thursday | August 26, 2010 ===
'''Burnt Coal Fires Up Young Artists'''<br />
Kids tell Oregon’s [[Boardman Coal Plant]] to walk the plank.<br />
Go to story: [http://itsgettinghotinhere.org/2010/08/26/guest-column-in-portland-students-and-the-community-paint-past-coal/ In Portland, Students and the Community “Paint Past Coal”]
 
=== Wednesday | August 25, 2010 ===
[[File:Amtrak-Doggy-Squadcar.JPG‎|thumb|Doggy Style: Amtrak's choice of "fly ride" for their doggy detectives shows the rail transport operator has the inner strength to purposefully derail its own train-centric bias.]]
'''Canine Cops To Sniff Rails From Portland To Seattle'''<br />
Amtrak's Vernae Graham claims doggy detectives to thrust noses into "all sorts of illegal substances."<br />
Go to story: [http://www.kbnd.com/395846.aspx Amtrak Goes to the Dogs]
 
=== Tuesday | August 24, 2010 ===
[[File:Honey-i-lost-the-house.jpg‎|thumb]]
'''Portland Casinos Await Voter Approval'''<br />
Measure 75's passage will bring gambling halls to Multnomah County dog tracks. Coming next: dens of iniquity and houses of ill repute.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.mycentraloregon.com/news/state/ap/178166/Ore-casino-backers-drop-lawsuit-voters-to-decide.html Ore. casino backers drop lawsuit, voters to decide]
 
=== Monday | August 23, 2010 ===
'''Pakistan Flood Relief: Be The Change'''<br />
As Pakistan's "epic floods" continue, Portland's Mercy Corps dives in.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.mercycorps.org/project/pakistanflooding Project: Pakistan Flooding - Mercy Corps is providing clean water, staple foods and clean-up tools to families affected by massive flooding in Pakistan, which has killed at least 1,600 people and affected 20 million people.]
 
=== Sunday | August 22, 2010 ===
[[File:Hendrix-and-Blonde.jpg|thumb|Portland's fake Jimi Hendrix poses with Vancouver B.C.'s actual blonde.]]
'''[http://www.blogger.com/profile/05997835666384194750 Vancouver B.C. Blonde] Does Her Part To Help "Keep Portland Weird"'''<br />
Beer, Jimmy Hendrix and a "sunny and stinking hot" Saturday Market are all part of her plan.<br />
Go to story: [http://ontheblogbandwagon.blogspot.com/2010/08/perfectly-portland.html Perfectly Portland]
 
=== Saturday | August 21, 2010 ===
'''Portland's Mayor Takes Aim At Loose Cannons'''<br />
Mayor Sam Adams asks [http://www.portlandonline.com/attorney/ openly female city attorney] to come up with new strategies for reducing gun violence in city. Local firearm fanatic [http://www.keepandbeararms.com/information/XcIBViewItem.asp?ID=1123 Kevin Starrett] derides proposal as "a desperate move by a disgraced mayor."<br />
Go to story: [http://news.opb.org/article/11231-portland-mayor-proposes-gun-restrictions-after-rash-shootings/ Portland Mayor Proposes Gun Restrictions After Rash Of Shootings]
 
=== Friday | August 20, 2010 ===
'''Get Folked Up This Weekend!'''<br />
Over twenty venues co-host Portland's first annual Folk Festival.<br />
Go to story: [http://oregonmusicnews.com/blog/2010/08/20/portland-folk-festival-for-the-family/ Portland Folk Festival: For the family]
 
=== Thursday | August 19, 2010 ===
'''A TV News Channel To Oblivion'''<br />
Local corporate media propaganda claims bicycling bad for business. Portland's business community claims otherwise.<br />
Go to story: [http://bikeportland.org/2010/08/19/bikes-bad-for-business-not-in-portland-38112 Bikes bad for business? Not in Portland]
 
=== Wednesday | August 18, 2010 ===
[[File:Salem-Witch-Trial-Hangings.jpg|thumb|Salem Witch Trial Hangings]]
'''"Mob Mentality" Breeds "Irrational Hatred" In Portland, Oregon'''<br />
Facebook comments threatening "fat, sick, twisted bitches" with "a tall tree and a short rope" invoke memories of "Salem Witch Trials," when "innocent women were condemned" for supposedly making a "covenant with the devil." Exposes Portland's "ugly side."<br />
Go to story: [http://thesop.org/story/opinion/2010/08/18/why-a-mob-mentality-an-irrational-hatred-for-dede-spicher-and-terri-horman.php Why a Mob Mentality, an Irrational Hatred for DeDe Spicher and Terri Horman?]
 
=== Tuesday | August 17, 2010 ===
'''Portland-Area Home Sales Plummet 30%'''<br />
"...it feels like the bottom just fell out..."<br />
Go to story: [http://www.oregonlive.com/business/index.ssf/2010/08/end_of_tax_credit_hits_portlan.html Portland-area closed sales of homes fall 30% in July]
 
=== Monday | August 16, 2010 ===
'''Let's Widen The Expressway To Hell!'''<br />
Responses to call for a rational, long-term transportation plan:
*Step hard on the gas pedal.
*Rack up more frequent flyer miles.
*Drill baby drill!<br />
Go to story: [http://blog.oregonlive.com/myoregon/2010/08/get_a_transportation_plan_oreg.html Get a transportation plan, Oregon]
 
=== Sunday | August 15, 2010 ===
'''Portland's "Charms" Backfire'''<br />
City ends up looking "a lot like Fayetteville."<br />
Go to story: [http://www.nwaonline.com/news/2010/aug/15/commentary-portland-oregon-charms-20100815/ Portland, Oregon Charms CITY A LOT LIKE FAYETTEVILLE]
 
=== Saturday | August 14, 2010 ===
'''Lackluster Local Lucre Licks Lone Lesbian Lounge'''<br />
The Egyptian Club, Portland's only lesbian bar, to close doors for good October 9th.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.shewired.com/Article.cfm?ID=25581 Portland Oregon's Lone Lesbian Bar Closing for Good]
 
=== Friday | August 13, 2010 ===
'''As Friday The 13th Dawns, Gloom Lurks In Shadows'''<br />
Portland forecast: sunny and hot. "Much warmer than yesterday."<br />
Go to story: [http://www.wunderground.com/cgi-bin/findweather/getForecast?query=97209&wuSelect=WEATHER 5-Day Forecast for ZIP Code 97209]
 
=== Thursday | August 12, 2010 ===
'''Electric Vehicle Charging Stations Popping Up In Portland'''<br />
Pentagon covetously sets sights on faraway lands selfishly hoarding large lithium-ion reserves. Possible invasion targets seen.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.mobilemag.com/2010/08/12/game-changer-first-public-quick-charge-station-for-evs-installed-in-portland/ Game Changer: First public quick-charge station for EVs installed in Portland]
 
=== Wednesday | August 11, 2010 ===
'''Heartless County Bureaucrats Threaten Entrepreneurial Tot With Hefty Fine'''<br />
Public outcry assures that seven year-old lemonade impresario gets to take her mom to Disneyland anyway.<br />
Go to story: [http://www.examiner.com/x-2759-Business-and-Finance-Examiner~y2010m8d11-Seven-year-old-entrepreneur-raises-cash-for-Disneyland Seven year old entrepreneur raises cash for Disneyland]
 
=== Tuesday | August 10, 2010 ===
'''A Bridge Too Wide'''<br />
Ten lane span threatens to drive ''even more'' highly-dangerous motor vehicles into city. No end in sight to roadway slaughter, fossil fuel depletion, resource war proliferation.<br />
Go to story: [http://news.opb.org/article/10864-oregon-washington-leaders-agree-key-i-5-bridge-details/ Oregon, Washington Leaders Agree On Key I-5 Bridge Details]
 
=== Tuesday | May 25, 2010 ===
Portland's architectural landmark, [[United States Custom House]], officially goes on the [http://www.auctionrp.com/Property_details.cfm?id=1166 auction block] today. Previous efforts to turn the building into a [http://djcoregon.com/news/2007/07/05/custom-house-vacant-2-years-after-rehab-deal/ 82-room boutique hotel] or house Portland's [http://www.oregonlive.com/business/index.ssf/2009/04/us_custom_house_may_house_inte.html International School] fell through. Ideas for turning the building into a home for a [http://blog.oregonlive.com/oldtown/2007/10/home_for_public_market.html Public Market], Sustainability Center or a Rose City Campus for the University of Oregon went nowhere. A couple of months ago, the Oregonian's [http://www.oregonlive.com/news/oregonian/anna_griffin/ Anna Griffin] thoughtfully [http://www.oregonlive.com/news/oregonian/anna_griffin/index.ssf/2010/03/someone_with_a_vision_should_t.html observed] that someone with "with a vision" should turn their vision for what should happen with this Portland treasure into reality. Here's a chance to step up and take that challenge. What is your vision for the [[United States Custom House | U.S. Custom House]]? Don't be shy; describe your vision [[United States Custom House | here]].
 
=== Tuesday | March 23, 2010 ===
Portland's message to upscale consumerism: "Take a hike!" [http://www.marketwatch.com/story/portland-oregon-saks-fifth-avenue-to-close-2010-03-23?reflink=MW_news_stmp Portland, Oregon Saks Fifth Avenue to Close]. MarketWatch
 
=== Saturday | March 13, 2010 ===
[[Portland Tribune]] [http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=126844704747622500&utm_source=New+Media&utm_medium=twitter 25 jobs @ semi conductor business in Gresham]
 
=== Saturday | February 6, 2010 ===
[[KATU]] [http://www.katu.com/news/business/83660252.html Health insurance now open to all Ore. kids]
 
=== Saturday | January 2, 2010 ===
[[Oregon Live]] [http://www.oregonlive.com/news/index.ssf/2010/01/portlands_2009_homicides_drop.html Portland's 2009 homicides drop to lowest level in almost 40 years]
 
=== Wednesday | December 23, 2009 ===
[[Portland Tribune]] [http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=126159682626943100 Shuttered Cascade Grain plant sold at auction]
 
=== Monday | December 21, 2009 ===
[[Portland Tribune]] [http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=126146417164280400 Zidell plans $20 million waterfront cleanup project]
 
=== Friday | December 18, 2009 ===
[http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=126116110490784900 Economist says Portland's economic strategy isn't working]. Portland Tribune
[http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=126120099927589200 Gold Coin]
 
=== Sunday | November 22, 2009 ===
[[KGW]] [http://www.kgw.com/news/local/Sewage-plant-shut-down-spills-3-million-gallons-71062437.html  3 million gallons of sewage into willamette due to power outage in oregon city]
 
=== Friday | November 6, 2009 ===
[http://blog.oregonlive.com/commuting/2009/11/us_26_tunnels_need_a_bath.html Vista Ridge tunnel partly closed tonight for high-pressure washing]
 
=== Wednesday | November 4, 2009 ===
[[Oregon Live]] [http://www.oregonlive.com/environment/index.ssf/2009/11/oregon_convention_center_opts.html Oregon Convention Center opts for rooftop solar]
 
=== Thursday | October 1, 2009 ===
<videoflash>Z1Jk2kPwUj0</videoflash><br />
<videoflash>LpGaEE5pOdA</videoflash><br />
 
Go to stories:
: [http://pjep.org/actions/?id=3106&t=1254373200 Econvergence: NW Regional Conference]
: [http://news.infoshop.org/article.php?story=20090924195722114 Portland, Oregon: EcoNvergence October 2-4]
: [http://portland.indymedia.org/en/2009/09/394489.shtml ecoNvergence Schedule]

Latest revision as of 14:45, 19 November 2011

This page is where stuff on the main page's news section goes when it changes from news to olds. Observe forgotten current events, humorous behavior and other hijinks of primitive human societies from the dawn of time!

Earlier Months

References